8th grade

so apparently I am fighting with J through our friends. We aren't speaking to each other, haven't in a week, which is about the longest ever for us. And mind you, at least a half dozen times one of us has been out of the country in the past few. He called my girl to vent, I called his boy to checkmate him because he is sooooooooooooooooo giving the after school special version of our HBO mature audience only situation. Anywhoo, I called and apologized to his friend for going off about the situation, that it wasn't a mature 1.7 minute phone call. He calls me back pleading with me not to end it. J loves me, but he's just going through a patch. Personally, I ain't never heard of no type of 2.5 year patch. And i would HATE to see how long a struggle would take...I instantly told his friend, Sinai, that he couldn't save the situation. Sinai is ALWAYS in my face to telling me to stick it out, running along my side like Diddy's personal trainer did him for the NYC marathon. But y'all I'm so tired. Not even inspiring words from my 2.5 year emotional trainer can help me. I call Sinai "false hope." Because that's what he gives me. He sells me a dream and i get a few moments lapse in judgement. I insisted that I was just tired. I shouldn't have to prove the type of person I am....

After the phone call, I did feel better. It's always a relief to have so many people from J's side support me. Must suck having your own friends think your a douche everyday. But the phone calls from J continue to my girl. Finally I had to tell via text, since he blocked me from facebook to stop. But not after I made one more call to Sinai to vent my hurt and pain from the juvenile actions on a networking service.....Do you know what this dude did? After alllllllll the "fuck that dude, I'm done, i can find someone worth my time more...fuck him fuck him fuck him....
" Just imagine an Italian girl from up top, bitter as hell, on a destruction path of verbal attacks. Do you know what Sinai got from this torpedo of emotions? He tells J that he talked to me, and that I love and miss J. ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS DUDE? You might as well be a TMZcorrespondent cause you twisting up E'RTHING! So now J is at home, probably laughing cause I'm sure he thinks that I'm a joke. After all this drama, pathetic lil 'ol me is at home crying myself to sleep over him....and even if that was remotely true it's none of his Gee-YOD damn business. :""( I love Sinai regardless, deep in his twisted head he thinks he's helping the situation by all of this...but I'm not tryin to sell J more of an ego boost. Leave that to the new chics.

Pertaining to our facebook issues....I found the pic of the two of us that they took at the club the night before all this drama happened. So, I liked the picture, but I didn't find it until Wednesday, post disaster. So why would I put up a picture of the both of us. I cropped his ass the hell out. I left all our other pictures alone because that would be just petty. You cant tell it's him, and on my myspace I kept the picture whole. He doesn't have myspace, and neither do his friends so I can post without worrying that this dude will think I'm pathedically attemtpting to reconcile. In yet ANOTHER phone call to my friend he went on and on about how I deleted him out of the 20 pics of us on facebook, I basically deleted him out of my life. NO BRAINIAC. I cropped you outta one. So apparently he calls my friend to relay that message to me. That he only deleted and blocked me because I started it. He officially is fighting with me via my girl. And apparently having messages relayed to me. I feel like I'm in junior high hell, and the homeroom bell just rang...the day has only begun....

Apparently this is going to be the level of the attempt at reconciliation I have to deal with: